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front cover of SLTN magazine
front cover of SLTN magazine

The Wine Guy with Guy Chatfield

Pretentious tasting notes are no help to anyone when it comes to recommending wine, writes Guy Chatfield

I THINK the best one I ever heard was on the Food & Drink programme that used to be on BBC2 about 20 years ago – “running through a field of hollyhocks, naked!”

Delivered with the usual flourish by the great Jilly Goolden, I have absolutely no idea which wine she was trying to describe, never mind the flavours and smells that she was trying to get over.
The thing is, I have used this example often over the years I have been doing training sessions for front-of-house staff, but always to demonstrate that this style of tasting note is just too much and plainly does not make sense.
Tasting notes play a vital part in selling the vinous delights on your list and if you get them wrong, your customer can potentially move from buying a bottle of wine that you have taken great care to select to choosing something less profitable.
I don’t have a magic bullet for this potential stumbling block, but I do have a couple of wee pointers that might be of use when you get around to freshening up your list.
Firstly, if it requires it, keep it simple – there is nothing worse in my mind than a list that is full of airy-fairy, pretentious nonsense (like the Jilly example!) especially when the environment of the place doesn’t suit it. Use simple descriptions that fit the style of your business – flavours and smells that the majority of your customers will identify with.
Secondly, keep it relevant – by all means suggest that a wine pairs well with a dish on your menu but avoid clangers like saying a wine goes well with spicy food when there isn’t a single dish like that on your menu or ‘great with a juicy steak’ in a fish restaurant. You may laugh, but I have seen both before….more than once!
Thirdly, put your own personality into it – either write them in the way that you yourself would speak or, even better, from the heart. I like nothing better than a note that personally recommends a wine – passion definitely sells!
So, let’s make sure the wine list is not an after-thought, as is often the case. Go on, I dare you to give it a go and even just write new and fun tasting notes for a couple of your wines.
I bet you’ll be surprised at how good it looks!